What is the state of loneliness? To really understand the term, you have to reach out to the heart of the problem. You are lonely because you are alone. Being alone is not the feeling we are talking about. It hits you when you think that there is no one in this world to care for you.
Are you lonely?
If someone is having plenty of friends, it doesn’t mean that he is not lonely. Being lonely can make you wish for a friend with a deeper interrelation. The count of friends in your friend list doesn’t matters. The quality of friends does matter as it provides life support and sense of security.
How to Tell If You’re Lonely
It comes to my mind that everyone is lonely in this life at one short stage or the other but these stages pass and we resume our normal day-to-day life.
True loneliness creeps in when there is:
- Denial mode for relationships. ( feel bitter for happy couples and people with lots of friends.)
- Absence of friends.
- Feeling as if “left out” by the crowd.
- Feeling of insecurities about acceptance in the world.
If you are not content with the nature of personal connections it will nurture the feeling of loneliness.
Feeling lonely escalates the stress and anxiety in life generating health issues.The levels of loneliness are surging at higher rates and increasing a person’s risk of dying early.
In Today’s era, technologies are evolving at a staggering pace. These lead to revolutionary changes that are affecting our lives. Social media is a prerequisite domain name altering the behavior in which we live life.
It opens a plethora of possibilities and ways in which we can connect with the people of the whole world. The irony is that the web has in abundance to offer but it makes us disconnect with the surroundings, relationships and human beings in front of us.
Human being is a social animal. Survival is possible by inculcating superior and good habits in life to enhance the feelings of happiness, belonging ness and social importance in the surroundings we dwell.
To run away from loneliness by making yourself busy and endless surfing of web are not the solutions. Disconnection from your schedule or social sites enhances the feeling. So, better confront it head on and overcome it with flying colors.
Stave off Loneliness
It is the rule of the world that everything is ever changing and dynamic. Nothing is permanent. Good time are bound to come after bad experience and vice versa. Don’t be afraid that the situation is not going to improve.
The first step towards conquering loneliness is by going out and making friends.
Defy Loneliness By Having Friends
You are deeply bonded to your family and friends. To connect emotionally with your loved ones efforts are required from your side to maintain a cordial and everlasting relation.
Connection induces positive vibes in one’s behavior. It brings confidence and moments to cherish in your lifespan. You are lonely when you have no friends and family around. You can’t talk alone and spend all the time within yourself.
Having friends is a medicinal prescription for countering the ill-effects of loneliness. Friends act as much needed oxygen for a fresh new lease of life as we can talk our hearts out and in return get the best advice for our problems. They are the best acting counselors without any extra cost.
Now, for maintaining the friends that matter most to you, a workout plan is required on your part.
Things we can do:
- Write a message
To connect writing a mail, a text message or a whats-app chat will suffice. Now, the mind is in a dilemma about how to start a conversation.
- How to start a conversation
For your help you can start with these sample statements: “I’ve been talking about something with my work colleagues and I thought of you. ” Or, “I gave somebody your reference this week and, as I was discussing about various experiences in life, you were a part of the discussion.”
- Plan your social network IRL (in real life)
To fill the friendship pool you have to look inward. What are the people that are the most important part of your life? The list will consist of family and friends. Also, mentors, godparents, neighbors, and teachers will be a part of the list. Now, you know whom you want to be your friends.
Join a club. Be more affirmative to invites. These small steps will help in the introduction and interaction with people to stave off loneliness.
- Enlarge your circle
Arrange a dinner party or an outing inviting friends with their partners who don’t really know each other. It enhances friend groups and amplifies the help needed to counter the feeling of being left out.
- Ask better questions and encourage deeper conversations
We tend to focus our introduction on what we do, rather we should talk about what’s on our mind. The focus should be on the interests of the people and what they have been contemplating lately?. Better questions will lead to longer and deeper interactions.
Remember: it is the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives. No clarification is required for your friends and none is enough for your enemies. The efforts you put into having friends –both new and old–will encourage your healthy and happy state.
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